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* Saturday, October 30, 2004 *
Even samurai have teddy bears...
Current Mood: Needy, I'm feeling very needy.
Current Song: BoA - Rock with you
I need someone to talk to >.< Just anyone. I just need to distract myself.
So, a girl came into Sapporo and she was very excited because she recognized me from Computing Science. I didn't realize that I was a noticable person. Apparently she also always sees me on the bus. Yunno, I notice blue-haired girl and shiny white leather bag asian-boy and people who have really noticable traits, but I'm probably the most typical person on the face of the planet...anyways, it made me happy.
I just deleted like 3 paragraphs of whiny angst, go me and my efforts to make this an angst free blog. Actually, I just know that I'll hate this blog if I let it turn into my emotional garbage can...just like how I hate my livejournal.
Well, I think I'm going to go and read shoujo manga.
Posted by Amanda at 1:43 AM
* Friday, October 29, 2004 *
Jacked from Venby~
Current Mood: Nervous for my 'morrow midterms.
Current Song: Beat Crusaders - Hit in America
1. Tell me one thing you love about me.
2. Tell me two things you love about yourself.
3. Look through the comments... when you see someone you know, tell them three things you love about them.
4. Do this in your journal so I can tell you what I love about you. :)
Posted by Amanda at 12:01 PM
* Wednesday, October 27, 2004 *
Eternal Happiness of the Sushiful Belly
Current Mood: Not very happy, though my belly is filled with sushi...
Current Song: MINMI - Shiki no Uta
Blah, I had such a horrible day yesterday...it was just a series of unfortunate events, one right after the bloody other. But since my family and friend's probably want to shoot me in my miserable face, I'm going to try and be happy.
So, I'm writing and essay on dragons on friday. Cool eh? Well, would've been cooler if I were in grade 3 and could merely write "Dragons are awesome. Dragons eat puppies for breakfast. When I grow up, I want to be a dragon!!". Anyways, I was a bit...bamboozeled about that. After reading carefully through Hobbit and The Wizard of Earthsea, I think Dragons are really interesting on a scholarly level. So I'm getting excited for this essay...unless she pulls a stupid topic out that I will blow my stupid mind.
Speaking of stupid minds, I got a B on my first essay. Apparently that's good... I don't really know...I mean, someone got A- (highest mark) that's like...a 10% difference basically and I don't think anyone in that whole class is actually intelligent, maybe it's one of the people who never speaks. Prof. also doesn't like my word choices...*shrugs* I just argue that I'm like a poet in the sense that I choose all my words carefully and precisely *pulls a word out of a hat* "Stupid" is the word that I've chosen for her opinion on my word-choices.
I'm considering buying a bunny. I don't know if I will for sure yet though, and here's why:
1) I haven't the slightest clue how to care for a bunny...but I'm fixing that with my MAD research skills.
2) I haven't consulted Momer yet.
3) Apparently bunnies don't like to be picked up and snuggled...but...they look so snuggly!!
4) They seem to be sickly and what not. I don't know if I can handle bunny death.
5) It's expensive...hamster is not. Hamsters also tend to be dirty little cannibals too though.
Well, more research before I subject some poor animal into my care.
What I really want is a kitty, but nooooooo~
Which makes me think about how I want to move the hell out of here. I don't think I can financially, mentally and what not...but staying here is driving me insane. I can't trust my room to not be robbed by my sister. There's nothing more mentally taxing (Well, there are plenty things I could think of actually, but I need the drama) than freaking out at her everytime something goes missing. I can never be sure if it's actually just missing or if she stole it...and she lies. I will go insane and strangle her.
I want to bake cookies, but there's no point to baking things you can't really eat especially when you want nothing more than you buckle down and emotionally eat all the bad things in the world away~ Bliss~
This getting happier thing didn't work >.<
Lance isn't letting me have cake...I've trained him well...too well. *twitches*
I'm going to go do something more productive~
Posted by Amanda at 6:54 PM
* Sunday, October 24, 2004 *
Bored as a cucumber~
Current Song: Koda Kumi - Cutie Honey
Current Mood: Bored and slightly hateful...
I'm so incredibly bored >.< Are cucumbers bored? Yes? Maybe? So I decided that I'm going to update my blog and hopefully add somemore links and just add to the general pretty-ness of the layout (I'm such a cocky bastard~) and maybe I'll fix those goddamned comments. Or maybe I won't.
So on thursday, I spent the day with Venby again~ They gave me a special bracelet~ Tis a Venby bracelet. Unfortunately it consists of two sex bracelets, so people are getting the wrong idea. Well, it's not as unfortunate as it is funny~ ANYWAYS, on thursday I bought:
~ Gothic and Lolita Bible vol. 10
~ Invader Zim DVD vol. 2 for Lance-smitty
~ Two sweaters for Omer to give to Mom
~ Lotsa cheap chinese food goodness
So yes, there's my awesome swag~
Hateful...hate...Lauren? YES~! That girl, even though we've NEVER ACTUALLY SPOKE, has invoked so much rage in me since like grade 11. Anyways, I don't feel like really going into why I decided that I hate her specifically at this moment, but there are general feelings of unhappy levitating in her direction none the less.
Othello is boring. This isn't really new news since I'm sure it was boring since the moment it was conceived. I don't really like tragedies...unless it's Oedipus. I find Oedipus almost comedic though~
I have a pretty shirt that I shrunk out of...so I'm thinking of taking the pretty sleeves and making it into some sort of funky arm warmers. But at the same time, I probably won't...too lazy. *sighs*
My halloween costume isn't as pretty as I want it to be...*ponders* Oh well~
Nothing else to really ramble about~ So I'm off~
Posted by Amanda at 10:38 PM
* Wednesday, October 13, 2004 *
Beowulf and Grendel: Amanda's Movie Must-See~
Current Mood: Excited!!
Current Song: HIM - Wicked Game
Oh my god, YES! This looks so freaking awesome! What a perfect time to create this movie~ It's like they knew that I love Beowulf so they decided to make a movie~ Anyways, I'm quite excited and will probably drag many-a-person to see it with me.
Anyways, while searching for pictures of the bloke who's going to be acting the part of Beowulf (he's not bad looking, I think he'll do~) I found this~
HURRAY~ I was very sad when my parents wouldn't take me to see it when it came to Edmonton (for you lazy bastards who didn't check the link, I'm talking about Phantom of the Opera).
Anyways~ I'm very much addicted to Alias. I've probably already mentionned it...but the story just keeps getting more and more exciting. *twitches*
I have no halloween costume still *sweatdrops* I just can't decide on what to do~ I'm so picky. It's possibly because Halloween is my favourite time of the year.
Now I have some angst to get off my shoulders because if I don't start expressing it, I might implode.
I'm feeling very resentful to Momer (Mom and Omer) lately. I really can't stand how out of all the times of the year to get married they just happened to choose the weekend of my father's death anniversary (how morbid...). So now every year, they fly away to some remote mountain hotel to celebrate their new love while I mourn the old love. It would just be nice to have her around...we don't need to talk about it, but I need that reassurance that she loved my father. Lately it's hard to tell since she sometimes compares him to Omer...almost as if to convince that we're better off with Omer. Also, I keep finding small little things about how my father wasn't the best husband and what not, and I really don't want to know these things. I would rather be ignorant.
Anyways, on November 4th I'm hoping I can go see his grave...I've only seen it once before. That sounds terrible but it's way out in the middle of the country. Now I have a car so I can go alone...well, not alone. I need a driving buddy so I don't get lost in the country side alone >.<
All around I'm not very sad just a little pissed and hurt. At least I've stopped crying about it. I think the last time I cried about my Dad was in english class when we were talked about cancer. I was perfectly fine at first but then I started to bawl. I really hate crying in front of people >.< Especially people I don't know well. Now, this doesn't mean I'm touchy about cancer...I joke about it all the time (not in a malicious way.)...just this conversation was on a more serious reflective level and what not.
~ END ANGST~
Anyways~ Everyone should go back to top and look at fun movie sites to lift your spirits~
Well, I'm going to go now~
Posted by Amanda at 11:58 PM
* Friday, October 08, 2004 *
Current Mood: Blah~
Current Mood: Tatu - Malchik Gay
I told myself that I wouldn't do any angsty posts in this journal and dirty it up with teenage banter. So, I'm just going to state that I'm REALLY insecure right now and leave it at that.
On the bright side, school was alright today. Kind of lonely still...didn't really see anyone today. I even had pocky for Jen...but she wasn't on the bus and I'm afraid the pocky won't last until sunday. @.@ Tasty pocky doesn't usually last a day around me.
I REALLY need to catch up on Full Metal Alchemist. Everyone's like "It's so good" and I know that~ It's always been good...but I just have no motivation to go searching it out and DLing it. I feel that I can be doing more productive things than watching anime...like...my homework.
Chinese is eating my soul again. Tones are just beyond me. My last two workbook assignments didn't turn out as well as I thought they would. The one thing that I think I have on everyone else is the fact that I have all the characters memorize (I can't write all of them, but I can read them) and I have this grammar figured out (since it's 100000x easier than French and 1000x easier than Japanese). But the speaking >.< I'm starting to feel disheartened and all that jazz. I guess if I don't get a fairly good mark at the end of the year, I'll probably give up and just focus on the language I know I can do, Japanese. *shrugs* Probably just insecurity talking.
I'm almost done reading Grendel...and yunno, the teacher said that Beowulf seems really mean in this version...but I think he's just more awesome~ Grendel sounds like a whiny misled teenager...I mean, I just can't sympathize with him. Well, I feel that he gets his arm ripped off and what not, but I would feel bad for anyone who gets their arm ripped off. ACTUALLY, I find this book pretty gruesome and yucky. Grendel likes to describe everything...like...masturbating bears and mountain goat brains falling out. Seriously, I just find the book pretty gross altogether, but the idea of it is nifty.
I have to go to work. Bai~
Posted by Amanda at 3:37 PM
* Thursday, October 07, 2004 *
Shopping with Venby~
Current Mood: Happy~
Current Song: Apex Twins - Tetris Remix
Today was a fun day! I spent lots of money.
- Some leg warmers to match my arm warmers (that are currently misplaced).
- Prince of Tennis v. 2
- Hot Gimmick v. 6
- Gothic and Lolita Bible v. 8 (So many pretty dresses pour moi to look at~)
- 2 packages of Chocolate Pocky (crack-cocain on a stick for those who don't know.)
To add happy to my day, my credit card came in the mail~ *pets credit card* BUT, I must be very careful with it~ Don't want to end up in massive debt...that would suck immensely.
I spoke with Nao today~ It was nice, it sounds like she's doing well. She's going to help me pick a university in Japan to go to where I can be close to her and we can do lots of shopping~
I keep changing my mind for halloween...but I think I would REALLY like to go as Alice in Wonderland. I love that book to pieces. I was wondering if anyone could help me with that? Maybe I'll ask Leslie's mom if she can show me how to sew...I would buy all my own fabric and the such...I just need...someone to show me what to do @.@
Well, I'm going to work on my chinese now~
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