I've been watching a little bit of Discovery Channel's Shark Week and it got me thinking. In all of the survivor accounts from shark attacks, someone always remarks that the shark always "mistakenly" attacked the person. You've heard it, all this crazy talk about "Oh, the shark thought the surfer was a seal."

The HELL? When a grizzly bear eats an innocent camper, no one ever says "Oh, well the bear mistook her for a giant salmon," or "Oh, the bear confused him for a gangly-looking, walking, talking raspberry bush." When a cougar stalks and kills a hiker, no one defends the cat by insisting that the hiker resembled a deer. So why are sharks let off the hook so easily? I'm not saying that the unfortunate victim need go all Captain Ahab vengeancy on said shark, I'm just out for a little equal accountability for all creatures big and small here.

I just don't buy into this "sharks don't eat people and if they do then the shark was just very confused" explanation. Yes, a lot of the reports insist that the shark was just curious by the fact that after taking a chomp out of the dude's leg, they all of a sudden abandon the idea and swim off. I personally think we could safely chalk that up to a more plausible theory -- that the shark in question who decides it's up for some Sunday Surfer Supper often realize that while we human prey are vastly stupid and easy to catch, we're also a royal pain in the ass once we're caught. After all, I doubt many seals they grab start to sucker punch them in the eye and kick them in their soft, fleshy gills. BAM! POW! BIFF! Maybe a Great White is just lazy when it comes to messing around with food that fights back and is quick to abandon us for some sweet smelling school of fish where all that is involved on Jaws' part is to swim straight and fast with his mouth wide open like a giant toothy fish net.

I have respect for sharks. I mean, obviously more so unbridled fear and overwhelming terror, but also respect. You think a shark can't tell the difference between a seal and a person? That they mistake the glint of light off an underwater wrist watch to be tasty fish? If I were a shark I'd be offended. I'd be all, "Fuck you, marine biologist, and guess what, you've just been added to my next weeks lunch menu. What's that, fancy pants shark researcher? You wanna say something about me too?"

So let's give the shark community a little credit here and say that more likely they were super hungry, there weren't currently any seals hanging around, "but hey, here's a convenient nibblet that was dumb enough to swim into my watery domain!" Luckily for humans, we have long agile limbs adapt at punching predators in the eyes with, which if I were a shark would be the last thing I'd want to put up with at the end of a long, grueling day. After all, I'd rather be labeled lazy than stupid. I have my shark pride to think of.

Two more books down, 130 more to go (though that number is constantly growing the more time I spend on Goodreads.)


His Majesty's Dragon by Naomi Novik

Dragons! War! Oceanic battles! Dragons! Napoleon! Did I mention, dragons? It is exactly as it sounds, and if by that you think awesome then you, sir, are correct.

Sleek and proper English navy captain, William Laurence, finds himself wrenched away from the life and career and everything he adores when his crew captures a French ship carrying a rare dragon egg. Sure enough, poor ol' Will inevitably winds up with the obligation and responsibility of said dragon (named Temeraire) and is thrust into Britain's Aerial Corps to meet the fight against Bonaparte's advancing forces in the sky.

The book wastes no time with preambles of any sort. I have to admit that I had my doubts leaping right into the plot in the first chapter, much less the first six pages, and it all felt a little rushed before we had even left the starting line, what with trying to digest the whole alternate reality dragon quirk that doesn't get explained at all before you're thrust into it head first. That aside, it's an interesting concept of taking real historic events and putting a fantasy swing on it, and you get the feel for it pretty quick. I really loved Temeraire himself and the sort of naive but insightful view he has towards everyone and everything. I also really enjoyed the relationship Novik created between the dragons and their handlers; it's very obvious that Will and Temeraire's closeness is built on mutual respect and genuine affection on the half of both parties (which is something I felt lacking from other similar series' like Eragon.) By comparison, the neglect of one of the other dragon characters, Levitas, was heart wrenching. I don't ever cry reading books, but I came fairly close in the case of his small side story. ;_;

Since His Majesty's Dragon is based in a time of soldiers and war, there are a fair amount of battle scenes. I am not an action buff and I'm not particularly interested in the details or dynamics of warfare, so the parts where the story fell short for me were some of the especially longer battle or strategy scenes. I think it's especially difficult to read action sequences since they don't come across on the page as they do watching them on a screen, but fortunately the aerial battles were easier to follow here than a lot of other novel fight scenes I could mention. What I did find pretty nifty, however, were the creative crew systems and gear setups Novik dreamt up for the dragons -- it wasn't as simple as the hero just jumping on the back of his valiant draconian steed and shouting CHARGE! It added a sense of realism -- or at least as much realism as you can create when you're talking about more or less replacing fighter planes with mythical flying beasts.

I'll most likely dip back into the series for more in the future, if anything just for the possible chance for a scene with Napoleon Bonaparte whooping around in the sky ecstatically on the bag a giant flying lizard. :D As a footnote, the author of this series was apparently a fanfiction writer/LiveJournaler who lived in Edmonton for a winter (her biography remarks upon a "truly alarming coat" she now owns from her stint here, LOL.) I'd be interested to learn which fandom(s) she wrote for.


House Rules by Jodi Picoult

Picoult's newest book is about an eighteen-year-old boy with Asperger’s Syndrome ( which is a high-functioning type of autism for those who are not familiar) and an obsession for forensic analysis, who is arrested for the murder of his social skills tutor.

My only familiarity of Asperger's up to this point had been the character of Jerry Espenson from Boston Legal, which is one of the reasons why this book initially piqued my interest. It's one of those conditions that a lot of people rarely hear about and it's always a bit fascinating getting a bit of a deeper glimpse into the day-to-day rituals, complications, and struggles an individual and family touched by something like Asperger's lives with. According to various reviews I've read, Picoult's portrayal of AS here doesn't always necessarily ring true (though who am I to say); but despite that, I greatly enjoyed House Rules, with the exception of the ending which I thought was way too sudden and failed at really tying things up. I hate the ambiguity, it leaves me sitting there forever just craving for closure! D: That, and I and every other reader figured out the "twist" ending barely before the mystery of the crime had even been established. No surprises in this one.

Picoult's books are always a bit of a hit and miss, which is strange when you consider the plots are always the same: Family becomes entangled in a high stakes legal drama centered around a thought-provoking ethical or moral dilemma! Enlists the help of a charming lawyer who becomes emotionally entangled with his client and/or client's family! Cue some sort of angsty romance or affair thrown in for kicks that the parents use as an excuse for coping with the drama! OMG TWIST ENDING!

Despite the redundancy, I admire the way she's always almost able to make all of her characters endearing and relatable on some level, and I can't help but keep going back for more. There have been ones that I've loved such as Nineteen Minutes and My Sister's Keeper, and ones that fell flat with me like The Tenth Circle. Her upcoming 2011 novel reportedly centers around a lesbian couple and gay rights in regards to starting a family in America, which I hope will be another gooder~


Next up on my list is Homeland, the first book in the popular Dark Elf trilogy, but I got as far as the prologue and then somehow became distracted with reading my favorite General Grievous fanfic again for about the fourth or fifth time. (I keep a copy of the whole massive thing printed out that spans across two Duo-Tang because I enjoy it that much. And also, because I'm a giant nerd.) It's one of those stories that hasn't been updated in years and will probably never be completed, which makes me all sorts of sad because we all know about me and closure. :C <-- Epic sad face.

I finally finished watching the 1995 Pride and Prejudice mini-series with Jennifer Ehle and the fabulous Colin Firth. It wasn't all the fireworks and earth shattering amazing that I've heard it praised as, but it was enjoyable. Definitely something I liked to sit down to with a plate of tasty chocolate cake while watching and grinning each time they showed a closeup of Mr. Darcy. What a scowly bear. X3 I have to admit I was slightly disappointed with the infamous wet shirt scene. From all of the hype it's garnered over the years, I wound up with this when I was really expecting more of something like this. On the note of wet shirts, I never realized how many wet, white shirts Mr. Firth has actually donned over the years. I think P&P unintentionally type cast him and wet shirts everywhere. There should really be some sort of Oscar award for it all it's own.

P.S. I was dismayed to witness Jane Austen's obviously discriminatory view on red-heads. On behalf of gingers everywhere, I am hurt, Ms. Austen. Hurt and dismayed! :C

As enjoyable a time that you always have on a camping trip, as relaxing, and stress free, and wonderfully lazy and refreshing as they are, there's always this little inner breath of relief let out when you walk back in the door of your house afterward. I love camping, but I forget sometimes how much more I love indoor plumbing. Especially spider-free indoor plumbing. And the complete lack of irrational fear of being eaten by bears on your way to pee during the night. And the added bonus of a cool basement in which you can finally escape the scorching heat -- a new plus that I particularly welcomed after sweating my proverbial balls off outside all weekend.

Despite my earlier worries that my cat would disown me when we returned home after leaving him on his own for the first time, Iroh was so relieved to see us walk in the door and was so constantly underfoot that I was more afraid of accidentally stepping on him as we unpacked. The one whole day he spent alone seemed to have left him a little distraught and under the impression that he'd been abandoned, and more importantly, that he'd never be fed again (as I'm sadly sure his love for his breakfasts and dinners takes priority over both Mason and I.) Knowing him, he probably greedily gobbled down all of the extra helpings I food rations we left for him before Saturday morning even came and then spent the next twenty-four hours moping that his food bowl wasn't being refilled. In comparison, Toby is a pro at weekends alone now, he just looks up when we come in the door and is all "Oh, you're back. Splendid. Dinner time yet?"

WARNING: HOUSE SPOILERS TO FOLLOW!

Season finale of House on Monday was FABULOUS! XD For the last two minutes of the episode I was frozen in a position of wide-eyed, arm-raised, squealy triumphant rapture. It was like waiting for Josh and Donna through seven years of West Wing all over again. I'm as giddy as a school girl for the next season and what I hope will include lots of hot Huddy snogging (and oh yeah, probably some little side plot to do with Thirteen beginning her slow and sad decline with Huntington's disease as ambiguously implied at the end of the show, but I think we know which is the more enticing storyline. Or perhaps I'm just a horrible person...) In any event, depending on what they have planned it may end up being a fitting place to end the series, in my opinion.

I joined in on the fun and signed up for a Formspring account and will probably check it regularly until the novelty wears off. Until then, ask me anything!

A new season of America's Next Top Model has begun, full of high-pitched screaming girls, cat fights, crazy clothes, crazier hair, and of course some makeover tears. Bring it on! For reasons I can't fully explain I just love ANTM. It's my guilty pleasure show, best when combined with tasty chocolate cake. Apart from just loving to see the finished photos, I'm ashamed to say that I think one of the draws is being witness to the insane all-girl drama that erupts in the Top Model house each season from the safety of my living room. You'd have to pay me a helluva lot of money to lock myself in a penthouse with twelve spastic young women under the eyes of nation-wide television cameras for three months.

Three books checked off my to-read list over the last month: Part of the Pride by Kevin Richardson and Born Free by Joy Adamson, both about human-animal bonds with wild lions in particular. The stories and the people in them and how they're able to form relationships with big game predators like this are fascinating to me~ I also finished The Pact by Jodi Picoult, about two families torn apart by the apparent suicide pact of their two children. It was more or less the classic Picoult child angst/parental grievances/courtroom drama plot that I've come to know (and love) her for, which I still end up enjoying no matter how many time she does it. My only complaint with this one is that the ending and outcome of the trial itself was, in my opinion, completely unrealistic. }:P Her newest novel, House Rules, about a boy with Asperger's syndrome accused of murder sounds like another typical Picoult book, but like always I'm eager to read it anyway.

I went out the other day and made (what is for me) a rare venture to purchase some new cosmetics. I bought some new sheer foundation, some mascara, a couple new swatches of eyeshadow (which according to my Google researching should be ginger-flattering), and two new facial moisturizers (the sales associate that helped me was scandalized that I used Vaseline lotion on my face as it is apparently a big no-no and does more harm than good.) This is why I hate shopping for cosmetics -- I have no earthly idea what I'm doing or what I'm looking for, which leads to me inevitably having to ask a makeup associate for help, which in turn almost always ends up making me feel exceptionally stupid and embarrassed. I walk through the beauty section aisles paranoid that every other woman is staring and judging me on my complete lack of innate female prowess with makeup.

On a related note, holy jeeze I had no idea there were so many shades of black mascara. Classic black, very black, emerald black, black brown, soft black, and what I'm sure is the king of all black -- blackest black. o_O How different can one black mascara look from another? I'm glad I opted for the much harder to find (yet with a much less intimating range of selection) brown mascara. Among all of the leagues of various blacks, there is just... brown. Straight, safe, simple brown. Much less work in my opinion.

Oh god, why oh why does Bruce have Harley Quinn's and other rogues gallery villains' costumes displayed in the Batcave? Does he just steal their outfits as soon as they change into the ugly orange Arkham jumpsuits? Harley fell down a giant chasm -- did Batman climb down and strip her costume from her broken, bleeding body? D: Is it like stamp collecting but with people's clothes that he then goes and trades for other better clothes with fellow Justice League members?

I don't care if you're a super hero or not, that's just creepy.

While we were camping this past weekend we were given a copy of the Wabamun rules and warnings which included a note about wildlife to watch out for, emphasizing in particular "BEARS".

o_O

Well see, now we're just confused. Are these bears abnormal in some way? Are they actually ferocious man-eating bunnies that you like to pass off as bears? Or maybe park rangers dressed up in cheap bear suits in an effort to catch us off guard breaking the May Long liquor ban? They obviously pose a possible threat of some sort since you went out of your way to wield the PWR OF TEH CAPSLCK. Were the ambiguous air quotes really necessary? Now we can't tell whether it's a legitimate warning or an inside joke on behalf of the campground clerical staff that we're not in on. Or perhaps some idiots still do not understand that quotation marks ≠ emphasis.

I just finished My Sister's Keeper by Jodi Picoult and I think it's the closest I've ever come to actually crying reading a book. The ending was... just... *anguished little noise* For fear of spoiling the story (which apparently I very often do unintentionally -- sorry!) you should just take me at my word when I say the book is amazingly good and you should all go read it now.

I started watching the first few episodes of Batman Beyond and it manages to fill the little empty hole that BtAS left after finishing off the final season. It's much darker than the original series... Watching the first episode suddenly makes the whole scene in Revenge of the Joker where Terry descends down into the graffitied Batcave so much more gut wrenching. D: Also, I don't know whether it's just because he's crotchety and old in this series or not, but Bruce is much more of a dick sometimes in BB. "Bring back the suit." "No!" *Beep* "GAAAA!" ^^; (Oh Batman, disgruntled and wrinkly as you may be, we still love you.)

On a reverse note, does anyone else cringe at how often Batman says "chum" in the older comics? I realize the character has changed a lot since over the years, but it's very... un-Batsy compared to today's modern Batman who's much more broody and much less... bromancey. Look at him, he smiling too much! It's unnerving. Like ol' Brucie's trying to throw you off and at any moment he's going to whirl around and punch you in the face when you're not expecting it. (Or rape you if you're Robin.)

"Come on, chum. Let's go home... and 'go to bed'." *Grins and swings off into the sunset.*

Suuure.